Wednesday, December 21, 2005

how to win friends and influence people

Self help books bother me. My stepdad has read many, and is very successful in his career, so maybe they work or maybe he's just really good at what he does anyway. Ok maybe it's not the books themselves that bother me, but the people that read them and follow their instructions literally and obviously in their day to day interactions with other people.

Don't you think I notice when you're making an effort to use my name at least 3 times while we're having a conversation? It's so irritatingly obvious that you're trying to make some kind of impact on me that will separate you from the rest. Well guess what? You come off as a try hard doofus who can't hold a real conversation without employing someone else's lame self-sales tactics. So yeah I guess you are setting yourself apart from the others. You're in your own lame league.

Also, don't fake that you are incredibly interested in my life and what I'm passionate about. I know you don't really care and it's just going in one ear and out the other or into your mental library which you'll reference methodically next time we meet.

It just bothers me so much that we have this stupid system where people strive to behave like this and use interpersonal relationships as some kind of currency.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

magic copier

Remember that annoying, not too bright girl in elementary school that thought she was so clever by copying your test answers over your shoulder? You knew she was doing it, everyone did, and it just made her look pathetic and annoying. That's how I feel about Canadian Idol.

Sass Jordan? Her name rings a bell but I can't figure out why her career should provide any basis for being a judge of what's hot and not in modern pop. AT LEAST get Alanis Morissette or something. And of course there's the token black dude to counter Randy Jackson. Farley, why don't you go work on Maestro's career.. it's quickly dwindling. Or maybe you're too busy inviting 17-year-olds to your Much Music Video Awards after party like you did with me and my girlfriends back in 1999. Creep!

The Simon clone is also annoying. At least feign some other extreme personality trait. It's just so sickeningly contrived.

Don't even get me started on the latest Canadian Idol winner, Melissa O'Neil. I'm sure she's a great girl, and yes she can sing but she sounds exactly like Kelly Clarkson. Her new single 'Let It Go' might as well be the 'Since U Been Gone' remix. That's all fine and dandy until the pre-teen market is saturated. I guess that's the main goal anyway. Don't any musicians want longevity anymore? It's all just flash in the pan success now.

Just look at the impact Canadians can make when they don't copy American pop culture. Trailer Park Boys, Tom Green, K-OS, Alanis Morrissette, Jim Carrey, and Mike Myers have all given us something interesting and original. Of course, then they all defect to Yankee Land.

The US is sucking our will to live!

Thursday, December 15, 2005

On The Corner

I realized last night that I have never seen any movies or TV shows or any interpretations in any kind of media about life on the drug infested east side of Vancouver. Until now, I really didn't comprehend the tragic reality for many people in my city. My friend was channel surfing and landed on the Adrenaline Drive movie channel, which was playing a film that I thought looked rather different from the usual blockbuster testosterone overdoses. It was one of those low budget films that you can tell is Canadian just by the way it's shot and the unrecognizeable actors. I admit this is how I had originally judged the movie we had landed on, entitled On The Corner.

The film illustrates the lives of brother and sister Randy and Angel as they try to survive in East Vancouver. Angel finally gets her act together after being hospitalized and hence being forced to withdraw from her addiction to heroin, just in time for her young brother to become a slave to the street drug trade.

This movie was impossible to turn away from. Finally, I saw the absolute despair of people who live mere blocks from me. Why had I never known of it before? I'd seen drug addicts yelling to themselves on the streets, and dismissed them as 'silly crackheads', but I had no comprehension of the absolute tragedy that takes place daily in my city.

Pictured above is Alex Rice, Canadian-born Mohawk actress who beautifully portrayed the downtrodden, heroin-addicted Angel. After getting her young brother a job as a drug dealer, he becomes addicted to crack and ends up becoming a male prostitute to support his habit; a neighbour beats her up and throws her down the stairs, putting her in the hospital; and finally, her best friend gets abducted by a pedophile.

There is no upside, no solution, no social worker who saves the day.

If you have ever felt sorry for yourself, or wondered why the infamous Hastings Street looks like hell on earth, watch this movie and you'll see the bigger picture.

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Gwen

I scalped my Gwen tickets. I realized that I couldn't think of any of her songs that I'd want to pay $80 to see live that weren't No Doubt songs. I even made an extra $20! I mean, she's hot and innovative kind of, but I needed the dough. I was slightly choked about not seeing MIA, though.